Oh Michigan, "How I Love Thee, Let Me Count The Ways"

So--the federal government is giving me
a good sized tax return--which thanks to Turbo
tax, I immediately found out how much I am getting back,

giving me enough time to consider what
foolish purchase I should make.

To stimulate the economy, of course. Quite patriotic, really.
foolish purchases. Ha.

Okay, so in reality, I will think about making a foolish purchase.
But will end up saving it.
Thanks to the saving, responsible values
my parents instilled in me.
Yay Dutchness. :)

But I had to laugh.
I filled out my federal taxes--and then
got all excited about my tax return.

Then came Michigan taxes.
mmm....

I get done filing my Michigan taxes and find out
that I owe Michigan...

one dollar.

yes. one measly dollar.
that I must MAIL in. With a check--no cash.

HA.

I mean, seriously now.
Really?

Oh, yes. Really.

Which of course makes me wonder--what would
they do to me if I just didn't pay it?
It seems too small for them to waste their time
tracking me down for one dollar.

I feel slightly annoyed with the whole state of Michigan today.
In a--this is sorta funny but SORTA ridiculous way.

But I will PAY THE ONE DOLLAR.
I will BE A GOOD CITIZEN.

Because....apparently,

"every penny counts"?

How Delightful

Today, I walked out of my apartment and "my" car was
just sitting there. Waiting for me. And I drove to work.
On time.

So Simple.

Yet, so beautiful.

"Dude, Where's My Car?"

There is nothing like a beautiful spring Tuesday morning.

This morning--I walked outside a bit on the late side,
around 7:20 am....
ready to go to work.

Today started about the same as every other day--
I pressed snooze one too many times.

I changed what I was wearing twice--because in the end,
I always choose comfort over style.

I couldn't find the right shoes--I almost forgot my lunch--
and I had to go back once I got half way to my car
because I realized I left my straightner on....

But finally, I made it outside ready to leave--
Carrying two bags, a coffee mug, and a purse.

So, with a very small amount of gracefulness,
I start to make my way towards my car.

Then, all of the sudden--I look around me and think...

mmm....that's funny......

where is my car? I thought I parked it right.....here.......
Which was quickly followed by the thought:
am I seriously losing it?!
maybe I need to start getting more sleep....

As I awkwardly walk around the parking lot with my two bags,
a coffee mug, and a purse.....looking terribly lost.....I still do not see my car.

Odd.

Exasperating.

Confusing.

What in the world?!?

Then....it hits me like a ton of bricks.

"My car" is actually Corey's car, which I am borrowing
while my car is getting fixed.

Corey's car doesn't have an apartment sticker on it.....
And I realize....

It had to be: I got towed!

mmm........
How am I going to get to work....?!

After a few phone calls, it is confirmed.
They towed my car for the small price
of being late for work and
128 dollars in exact change...cash.

I called today my bitter day--because I feel a little bitter.
Considering that this "car of mine" lived
at my apartment complex for a total of 8 hours or so.
And it just so happened that in those 8 hours,
the "random" search for unstickered cars
by the towing company happened.

And there was no possible way
I could have informed my apartment
office that I would have a different car--
since by the time I knew,
the office was closed.

But on the upside--at least I have a loving mother that came
and picked me up for work in her very attractive gold mini-van.

And at least it wasn't stolen? Because let's be honest, everyone
wants a 97 Old Cutlass.....right, Cor?

Ecclesiates 11: 5, 9-10

God brought me to these verses tonight,
as a lie awake unable to sleep.
My sleeplessness MAY have something to do with the fact
that I took a nap at 6: 30 and then drank coffee at 7:30.
Oops....

"Just as you cannot understand the the path of the wind
or the mystery of a tiny baby growing in its mother's womb,
so you cannot understand the activity of God,
who does all things....

Young people, it's wonderful to be young!
Enjoy every moment of it.
Do everything you want to do; take it all in.
But remember you must give an account before God
for everything you do.
So refuse to worry,
and keep your body healthy....
Don't let the excitement of youth cause you
to forget your Creator."

For some reason, I was astounded by these verses tonight.
So, I am going to read Ecclesiastes 10-12 all week...
because I believe that God is going to speak to me through them
in a powerful way.

I might let you know how that goes for me. :)

Well...anyways--Here's to another attempt at sleeping....

Attitude Adjustment Room? What?!

In high school, my basketball team always made fun of
one of the schools in the KVA (our conference) for having
a sign over one of their rooms that said

"Attitude Adjustment Room."

We always thought it was such a joke. And wondered in
what circumstances students were actually sent there.

This summer, I almost bought a wooden paddle in a
beach shop that said "Attitude Adjuster" on it because
I thought it would be funny to put on my desk.
(as a joke, of course....) :)

And even though these things are funny, I realized today
that maybe there is something of value with these ideas.

This morning, my pastor talked about the difference
between joy and happiness.

Joy comes for a source. (like God)
whereas happiness is dependent upon earthly cirumstances.

He spoke of the mornings when we wake up, and find
ourselves wanting to go back to bed.
Because the day seems like too much to handle:
whether its work. school. stress. difficult relationships.
difficult conversations or decisions, etc.

So, we gripe. we whine. we become crabby.
And all the sudden...our world becomes about us.
Without even realizing it.

We say, "I am sad. I am worried. I don't want to face the day,
so I have the right to be crabby and difficult.
maybe even angry or rude."

The point that stood out to me today is when he said that
this attitude makes us inherently selfish--ME ME ME....

When I look at my life as overwhelming,
as sorrowful or burdensome, I allow myself
to live with an attitude that damages my
relationships or the people around me.

I take it out on people. I excuse myself from
doing the good I am intended to do
because of the way I feel that day.

I miss opporunites to help my students, to love
my friends and family, to seek God's will, to
bring joy to the lives of others.

My life has not really been as "circumstancially happy"
as usual lately. There have been many good circumstances,
but it has been harder than usual.

There have been days when I have woken up sorrowful,
and I have focused on my own issues and difficulties
throughout my entire day.

I have allowed my "issues" to be big in my life.
Because I have often focused on the issue.
And not on Christ.

The truth is, my issues are small in comparison to what
others have been through or are going through,
which doesn't make them any less legitimate,
but it does put things in perspective.

And though God allows us to feel sorrowful--to even be
angry and hurt for periods of time--He calls us to joy.

He calls us to perseverance. To an attitude adjustment.
To concentrate on His goodness and love.
To live in freedom and truth.

Because when I can't do that, I know I live selfishly.
I only care about my own heartaches, my own issues.
And I lose sight of all the blessings.

I asked God to put five people on my heart this week.
Five people that I am going to work at encouraging and loving.

So I stop focusing on myself.
And the "stuff" that has permeated my thoughts.
Because the the truth is, those things will work out without
me obssessing over them.

My pastor left us with this acronym:

JOY

Jesus
Others
Yourself....dead last.

I want to live like that.

Tap...Tap...Tap....(AAAAHH)

I am not overly afraid of much--not of the dark,
not of rollercoasters, of getting dirty, or getting
knocked down in an athletic game.

After all, my brothers would have never let me
get away with that.

But there is one thing...specifically...that turns me into this
girly, screeching, oh-no, AAAAHHH stressed out!! person.

And that thing is...critters.

Last year, I had mice living in my apartment. I didn't
eat breakfast for a straight week because I would hear
the sounds of mice crawling and I just couldn't bear to
go in the kitchen and see one. I didn't even hardly turn
on a light in the morning.

When I looked at the mouse traps, I had to take a deep breath
each and every time because I was engrossed in fear.

Then today, all the sudden I hear.....

Tap tap tap TAP TAP........tap.
sounding uncomfortably....close.

I look outside, and right on my porch ceilingish is this
big hole with a mystery
ENORMOUS CRITTER chewing at the wood.
(okay, its probably not THAT enormous, but in my mind it is...)

The first things I think--besides OH NO--is, mmm....
can that critter chew through the wall--the wall that
is right by my bed?

My dad does a great job of calming my fears by saying
that the critter CAN chew through the wall if it can chew
through wood. Thanks dad. :)

And so, here I am. Significantly more uneasy than I was five
minutes before. Trying to think of anything but the critter,
and somehow thinking of NOTHING else but the critter.

All I think about is my greatest fear--waking up with a
CRITTER in my bed!!!

And the conclusion I came to is...

It's official--I am a critter pansy.